Sometimes, I wake up in the morning with the mindset of instantaneous accomplishment. I will go through the majority of my day, thinking only of the eventual ending point in my career; the ultimate plateau and climax of my success in which I will be the most productive, while also having to work the least amount of hours a day, and make the most money that I ever have.
However, typically by the mid afternoon to early evenings on days like these, I hit a wall. I realize that this eventual “perfect” life and job time in my life is still very far off an that the reality is me, an undergrad student, working a minimum wage job, and just starting this whole blog thing. Then, even beyond my current situation, there’s the whole process. I still have around two and a half to three years left of my undergrad, then comes comes the frantic and seemingly endless job search until I finally end up at a point where I can I’m working in my field. With this step, I will most likely land my first writing job and begin at an entry level position that may or may not pay great, and most definitely will satisfy my long-term goals of leadership, control, creativity, and decision making in my job. Nope, it probably won’t be until my second, third, or even fourth job title or position that I will achieve some of these goals, and it may take longer than that.
Once I have realized and thought about all of that, the overwhelming and rather un-settling uncertainty of my future runs through my head and gut, leaving me with not much confidence to match my previous enthusiasm.
So here’s my goal: get to the point where the enthusiasm overruns the doubts and to become content with the journey I am on. I realize that I am a long way from my eventual goals. I realize that writing is not the most stable career coming out of college, and I realize that I am going to face rejection, have to work very hard to move up, and continually improve on my skills to be a competitive employee. At this point, I am letting all of that, and the fact that I still have three years before graduating get the better of me on occasion. I want to be content with the journey towards my eventual goal, and know that all of it will help me improve and achieve what I want in the end.
I also want to acknowledge that these types of reality checks are healthy. In order to be successful in a writing career you cannot search for instant gratification, and you cannot ever stop attempting to improve your skills. In order to excel you must improve, and in order to be happy you must be realistic. The fact that I am doubting my career is okay, and not a bad thing.
I also tend to think of the time I will spend in college as a waste. I am so anxious to have a degree, to get a job, and to start fully functioning in my field that I forget to remember that I am in college for a reason. Is graduating early a money saver? Yes. Are all of the classes along the way just required checkpoints that can be forgotten once transcripts are posted? No. I need to keep in mind that my college education is preparing my for my later career, and that it is not wasted time.
So, that is my goal right now. I need to be content with the journey I am on, realizing that I will eventually get where I want to be. I need to remember that the plan I have is worth it, and not a waste of time.